Thursday, May 10, 2007


Ok, after a long absence, I'm back. Just like it say in the above title. I am going to try and have a daily (close to daily) post that is Fantasy Baseball relevant. My blood pressure has been rising up and down for the past month and a half and I figured it was probably because I didnt have an outlet for all the drama involved in mananging a team in a pretty competitive league. So i'll try to write and let my rage hit the page. I want to make a few disclaimers first: My style is going to be borderline copy-cat to the wonderful people over at The Talented Mr Roto, where I just get on here and meat out on a post and make observations about the daily baseball happenings. My grammar and structure and spelling and organization and all that stuff will be, erh, bad. But I think it'll be able to give whatever readers i have out there a chance to really get inside my head as i ponder the wonderful sport of Baseball. And just like those guys at the real site; i'll throw some pop culture, personal experiences, and current events into the mix. Basically i'll just meat out. I aint joking when i say this: it will be a bunch of monkey business. If you want a dose of real talent go visit my inspirations: That site's blog is really the best out here. Im just an amateur trying to do something fun with all my fantasy thoughts and give all the hardwork spent some purpose.

Ok, another thing. I am going to do it a little differently then them. I will focus on my own particular team. Im not too worried displaying some sort of hidden strategy to the other league members cuz i aint got one. and none of them will probably read it.

Ill jump right into it. After my team we'll take a look at the famous box scores....

Here is my Team:

C - Russell Martin - he is a complete meathead. The entire off-season I have been dreaming of his potential. He hits for AVG, will hit a few jimmy jacks and steal a couple. Today he was Ofer but i cant complain with his performance.

1B - Richie Sexson - I have a few of these TYPES on my team. Those guys that are so frustrating to watch because you have suffer through their frequent slumps to get the big "hot streaks". Today he came in down by a 100 and grounded out. That aint so odd.
2B - Ian Kinsler - I have been obsessed with Kinsler for a good 2 years. This year I had Josh Barfield in my sights and as the serptine draft made its way back to me I watched 10 guys get drafted without the last name Barfield before my buddy autodrafted him. I cursed loudly and the quickly, excitedly, nervously selected Kinsler. I felt a wave of relief drain out of my body. I was happy. Tonight Kinsler continued on the path of his latest trend to strikeout 3 times. He'll be ok. He'll be ok. I hate it when people say that, "he'll be ok" how do we know? he could be horrible. I doubt it.
3B - Alex Rodriguez - ill be tapping away about Arod this year. He actually swung and missed a pitch. What nerve. Im thinking of trading him for Casey Blake. Blake has been HOT!!! He is great.
SS - Troy Tulowitzki - Another guy that I am obsessed with this year. He was 2-4 with 2 RBIs. cant complain with that everyday.
OF - Andruw Jones - oh the humanity, oh the humanity. It looks like he's decided to come around a bit. He's brought his average back to .245, whatever happened to "contract year"

Ok, im tired of typing, so here is a short version.

OF - Juan Pierre -2/3 2 bags
OF - Billy Butler - 1/3 on the "chopping block", could be a year away from glory
BENCH - Shane Victorino - did not play tonight - could he be this years Hanley?????
UTI - Placido Polanco 3/4 couple of RBIS, Rs... i gotta stick with him this year. He's going keep my AVERAGE up.
UTI - Dan Johnson - He was in my lineup today. this line is worth postng. 4-4 4R 2HR 4RBI, WOW!!!! I have high hopes for this fella. I doted on him last year and got burned. It cannot happen twice.
BENCH - Stephen Drew - a sore subject right now.
BENCH - Willy Taveras - "this year's Hanley Ramirez?????

none of my pitchers pitched tonight so i'll call it quits.

SP - John Smoltz -
SP - Cole Hamels
RP - Mike Gonzalez
RP - Joakim Soria
P - Matt Capps
P - J. Accardo
P - Matt Cain
BENCH - Scott Kazmir
DL - Pedro Martinez
DL - Bob Wickman

I might not post again unti monday but i WILL NOT give up. I swear. Im watching Scrubs right now and do not have the mental capcity.

NOTE - this post was not spell checked.

Friday, January 19, 2007


I just wrote the little praise for Elvis below and I feel Pet Sounds deserves equal or more praise. PET SOUNDS - I LOVE YA. This is MUSIC, BUY THIS CD. It will change your life.

I love you because......

I was wasting time in Barnes and Noble and stumbled upon a big hardback book titled "Rolling Stones, The Rolling Stones 500 Greatest Albums ever" and was immediately sucked into it. Ive always been a big believer in the notion that music will pacify the most rotten souls. Music is a part of my life and i cant think of anything better than spending a few hours of that life listening to music. they should drive armored trucks around Iraq playing Miles Davis on repeat and after a few years the country would be meeting to discuss under age drinking.

But lets get back to the purpose of this post. The first album on the list was

1. Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band - THE BEATLES- it is the best album ever. I remember there was a period of my life when i was desperate for money; so i would scrounge through my parents' CDS to find anything useless to hock for a couple of bucks to the used CD store. (also, that gay guy would give me $30 credits when i gave him 1 CD. and i would buy Phish CDS, So i really was making money) I remember finding my parents Sgts Peppers CD and listening to it at the age of 16 and thinking "this is F*cking Awesome, I cant sell this!!!!!!!" It is an unanimous #1 album ever created. Congrats Beatles you did it!

#2 Pet Sounds THE BEACH BOYS- I am 100% sure my old man grew up listening to the Beach Boys but he did not have this in his collection for me to pawn off for the enormous credit. I will admit that if he did have this in the collection it would've been sold faster than i could order 5 cheese krystals. BUT, I know he listened and loved the beach boys. I did not discover this album until I moved to NY and became financially attached to ITUNES. Let me tell you though when i did finally download Pet Sounds I was so mesmerized and in love with this CD that i could've emulated Brian Wilson and stay in my room for weeks listening to this on repeat... it was that good! THIS AS GOOD AS IT GETS.

#3Revolver THE BEATLES - I discovered this in college and remember, absolutely adoring the song "michele" but that was about it. Its a great album and I love listening to it but its not my favorite. I cant argue against The Beatles.

#4 Highway 61 Revisited BOB DYLAN - OOOOHHH AAAHHHH Bob Dylan is the American Musician. Enough Said!!!!! My favorite is QUEEEEEEN JANE! (Queen Jane Approximately) Bob Dylan WOW!!!!!!!!!!!

#5 Rubber Soul - THE BEATLES
#6 Whats going on - MARVIN GAYE
#7 Exile on Main Street - THE ROLLING STONES
#8 London Calling - THE CLASH
#9 Blonde on Blonde - BOB DYLAN - MY FAVORITE!!!! put this in the player and get in a hot bubble bath. You'll emerge a new person.
#10 The White Album - THE BEATLES - this is GREAT!

#11 - The Sun Sessions - ELVIS PRESLEY this is why i decided to write this blog... when i browsed through the big 100 albums book at Barnes and Noble i focused on this particular album. #11 and its Elvis. It is available on ITUNES but for some reason i decided to buy it used off Amazon; it came in a few nights ago and i have been listening to it NON-STOP. What a great album, the best. It sounds like Elvis is at his buddies house singing into a microphone. The songs are wonderful. I think I might bring this along with me on my desert island fantasy. I cant imagine a better life than sitting stranded on a small little island, swaying my hips back and forth to the sounds of a young Elvis belting out tunes. GO BUY THIS CD! I PROMISE ITS A GEM. you will thank me. I know you will.

Friday, January 12, 2007

T'aint Misbehaving

This is a gorilla version of the best Mr Show with David and Bob episodes. I think I remember reenacting this very scene on Spring Break 2K2..... hahahahaha

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Monday, January 8, 2007

Top 10 hardest NES games.

A while back I had started in my head a list of the top ten NES games ever manufactured and distributed in the United States. I think this would've been good but probably not too original. I mean everyones favorite would probably include Zelda, a combo of Super Mario1,2,3, Tecmo Bowl, RBI Baseball, Blades of Steel, Mike Tyson, Contra, Metroid etc etc. So as I was filtering through all of the games I owned or played throughout my childhood I realized that a lot of my favorite games were the ones that I left un-conquered with my own hands. I played these games feverishly into the late nights and early mornings and could never "Beat" them.

So this blog has two intentions: 1. to exorcise my NES demons that are still lurking in the crevices of my fragile mind. 2. to post out to the world in hopes that someone sends me an email or post claiming victory over one of the games that still haunt me. (please dont lie to me) Also, I will bashfully admit that I did, in fact, conquer a few on the list. I will start with those first and then work my way to my most agonizing failures.

10. Ghosts' n Goblin - I got hooked for a long time to this game. You start the game as the scrawny Arthur and run around in a graveyard fighting all sorts of undead creatures. I was able to beat the game to find that you had to beat the game again at a harder level to see a very pathetic ending. That suxed

9. Wizards and Warriors - I did beat this game and barely remember the ending. I do remember that I spent hours upon hours of jumping out of my chair and spinning around foolishly as my warrior lay slain on the bottom of a cave floor with his right leg dangling back and forth. I do remember the annoying, yet addictive theme song dun dunnah nah nuh.... dun dunnah nah nuh. Ah that music will forever be etched into the superstructure of my soul. If any of you have played this game please let me know. I've always wondered how many of yous (new york dialect) have played and enjoyed this treasure. 8. Metal Gear - I don't have too much to say about this game other than to display my utter disgust to learn that the radio code that I searched for in every chasm, nook and cranny, the
game's layout had available for me to learn, from word of mouth, that it was on the back of the box that I so foolishly ripped to shreds when I got home from the store. I've always enjoyed looking on EBay to see some guy's collection of Nintendo games neatly aligned on a dark blue cheap plaid bedspread. I love to imagine what kind of person I had discovered. Did he play the games all night as i did and then when finished solemnly place the cartridges back into it's perfectly crisp cardboard box? I find this person fascinating to imagine because when I finally, clumsily headed off to bed my entire nintendo collection would lay scattered on the hard tiled floor submerged in a dirty mess of socks, empty coke cans and other various teenage frills. Once I managed to obtain the code from a friend, defeating the metal gear was a matter of time.

7. Castlevania - This game is a classic. I remember the first time I made it to one of the final levels. I took a deep breath and calmly hit the pause button allowing me to walk a few quick laps around my room. Once I hit unpause I was immediately introduced to a world of jumping monkeys and spinning conveyor belts. The 3 lives that I had saved were quickly eliminated by careless frantic moves. But because I am not a quitter I labored onward and found my way back to these levels on a consistent basis. Pretty soon I was bouncing about the screen left and right slashing my whip about in every direction. I had a little trouble with that nasty Grim Reaper and Dracula was pretty tough but I was triumphant in the end.

6. Zelda II A Link to the Past - This is the best Zelda game ever. It was probably one of the first games to challenge people without losing some of its "playability". I must admit that I never owned the actual Nintendo cartridge. One of my childhood friends Jeff Huxen lent me this game when it was in it's absolute worst of conditions. I managed to work my way to the end of the game and was having a hard time beating those little bastard red armored knights on the seconde to last stage. After all that exhaustion I was deeply troubled to find the game's memory wiped after a few rigged attempts of getting the game to work. If you remember if the screen blinked while loading you risked an erasure of memory. I was re-introduced with Zelda II while in graduate school @ Ole Miss. I loaded an NES Emulator onto my laptop and this time I finished the deal.

5. Karnov - Let me start off by saying that with minimal reflection this game was Dee-gusting. I did not own this game but did play it quite a bit. The only playing time logged for this game was late in the night @ Mark Hemleben's house. I remember only making little progress in this game but for some reason it has always stuck out to me as a game that I would've liked to "beat". The farthest I ever made it was against the T-Rex shown on the box.

4. Ninja Gaiden - This game I did own and played soooo much. I remember staying in my room for hours upon hours, holed up in my closet panting and screaming at my little 10" screen. I was able to witness a genius defeat this game with little effort. His name was Chris Raggio. I remember going over to the Raggio's one saturday afternoon and was allowed to enter Chris's room. Neil and a few of his friends all gathered around as Chris casually "beat" Ninja Gaiden. I went home in utter disgust at my lack of talent with the game.

3. Tiger Heli - this game was HARD. I remember spending countless hours over at Jeff Huxen's house trying to beat this game. This is the all time best aerial helicopter / plane and probably the most frustrating. It was great fun but I must admit we never even got close. If anyone out there ever played this game please tell and let me know how far you were able to make it.

2. Rush N Attack - This game is also one of my favorites. I remember exactly the time I bought this gem of a game. It was, in my mind, the best "side-scroller" game for the NES. The tough part about this game was that if you got touched once you were dead. At times you could have a troop of parachuting, gun toting soviets tantalizing you from above as they landed. While dodging the bullets from above you were simultaneously dispatching jumping red men, persistent yellow gunmen and a bottomless gorge of mindless grunts. I never beat the game but, once did have the opportunity to fire a few mortars into the direction of the ICBM (Intercontinental Ballistic Missile) aimed at American soil before I was slain by it's protectors.

1. Jaws - This is another one of my favorites. It is a very simple game yet impossible to beat. You are Roy Schneider driving around in a sail boat looking for Jaws. You start off with a power 1 and no tracking devices and try to work your way up to a power 5 or 6 which makes it easy to beat. Your little Roy Schneider gets speedier by eating crabs. You get power ups by trading in conchs that you collect fighting off a host of jellyfish, stingrays and baby jaws. You can get conchs from the various bonus scenes where you drop coconut bombs onto dancing jellyfish as well. I still play this game from time to time on the computer and have yet to defeat it. I need help. I am always able to quickly build up a power level of 3-4-5 and then get a crack or two at Jaws. Once I reduce him to zero power and face him on the boat I have no idea what to do. PLEASE HELP.

If you want to play any of the games above check out the site a good friend Sir Chad Mars turned me onto this one and it has been a favorite site ever since.

One game that I feel I should mention this game Spyhunter, this game was a bunch of fun but IMPOSSIBLE. Anyone who says they succesfully beat this game is a liar. The game has no ending and that is what is so disappointing about it. I did not find this out until recently. I was always barely able to elude "The Road Lord" and "The Enforcer" but was quickly dispatched by "The Mad Bomber" the helicopter that followed your every move as it dropped precise bombs all over the road. If you were ever lucky enough to get a few missiles off you risked having one of the missed bombs falling back down onto your spy car. I was able once to get in the boat once and that was a real treat.

What a great way to start the day! Farside is the best.

Friday, January 5, 2007

Fantasy Sports - I am ALIVE!!!!!

I was lucky to stumble upon a "2nd chance" fantasy league that allowed for me to squeeze out that last drip of fantasy football. This style of play is unique and fresh to me. Here is how it works, tell me what you think of my chances.

(1) entry will cost you 50 clams. (hahaha)

With one entry you are able to pick from the entire pool of "playoff players". The max amount of players that you are allowed to pick is (18).

There is no draft. you are able to pick whoever you want to be on your team. Each week of the playoffs you are required to start the following:
1 QB
2 RB
2 WR
1 K

And from these players you gain points that are cumalitive. So if I start Peyton Manning against the Cheifs and he scores 4 TDS with 400 yds I am rewarded, but if he does that and the Colts lose then I lose Peyton and that QB spot. Here are my two teams....


Peyton Manning <-- Starting week 1
Drew Brees
Philip Rivers

Larry "Grand Ma Ma" Johnson <-- Starting week 1
Tiki Barber <-- Starting week 1
LaDanian Tomlinson
Shaun Alexander <-- Starting week 1
Reggie Bush

Marques Colston
Terrell Owens <-- Starting week 1
Antonio Gates
Reggie Wayne <-- Starting week 1
Todd Heap

Adam Vinateiri <-- Starting week 1
Nate Kaeding

Patriots <-- Starting week 1


Peyton Manning <-- Starting week 1
Drew Brees
Steve McNair

Larry Johsnon <-- Starting week 1
Shaun Alexander <-- Starting week 1
Brian Westbrook <-- Starting week 1
Thomas Jones
LaDanian Tomlinson
Jamal Lewis

Marques Colston
Bernard Berrian
Marvin Harrison <-- Starting week 1
Antonio Gates
Darryl Jackson <-- Starting week 1

Josh Brown <-- Starting week 1
Robbie Gould

Patriots <-- Starting week 1

Root for me. Or make this the motivation to root for my demise. Either way have fun.

Here are the rules..... Let me know what you think of my chances. I know im pumped for the playoffs...!!!

Lineup and Scoring Rules Scoring [Note - Regardless of the position that is doing the rushing, throwing or receiving the point total is thesame.]

a) 1 point for every 20 yards passed (Rounded to nearest hundredth, i.e., 227 yards passing = 11.35 points)
b) 3 points for each touchdown thrown
c) 1 point for each two point conversion thrown d) -1 for each interception

a) 1 point for every 10 yards rushing (Rounded to nearest tenth, i.e., 89 yards = 8.9 points)
b) 6 points for each touchdown
c) 2 points for each two point conversion

a) 1 point for every ten yards receiving (Rounded to nearest tenth, i.e., 109 yards receiving = 10.9 points)
b) 6 points for each touchdown
c) 2 points for each two point conversion

a) 1 point for each successful PAT
b) 3 points for each field goal 39 yards and less
c) 4 points for each field goal between 40 and 49 yards
d) 5 points for each field goal between 50 and 59 yards
e) 6 points for each field goal between 60 and 69 yards
MISSED FG’s -1 point deducted for missed FG’s 1 to 40 yard(s). MISSED XP's -1 point deducted for missed XP's.
Special Teams/Defense [Note: Both the player and the team can get credit for the same touchdown on special teams. If Santana Moss returns a punt for a touchdown, both the team that has Santana Moss in their lineup and the team that has the Redskins in theirlineup score points.]
a) 1 point for each sack, fumble recovery, INT
b) 6 points for each defensive touchdown
c) 6 points for each punt or kickoff return for a touchdown
d) 2 points for each safety
POINTS ALLOWED (Points only count if defense/ST is on the field at the time of the score)
a) 10 points for a shutout
b) 5 points for 1 to 7 points allowed
c) -5 point(s) for 31+ points allowed.

Thursday, January 4, 2007

The Top 10 Sexiest Black Men

After much deliberation; picking en choosing, fussing en fighting, I have finally widdled the list down to 10. There are several important variables that must be considered when selecting from some such a pool of candidates. Please agree or disagree as you wish.

10. At ten we have Mr. Chad Johnson, or recently known as Ocho Cinqo. Whats great about Ocho is his selfish passion for the game and his brash disregard towards management, especially the Bengal's own Chris Collingsworth. This past football season Mr. Johnson was a bit quiet with his antics and gathered the most attention when he took the practice field for the Colts Monday Night showdown wearing plastic boots with pictures of all this seasons touchdowns. Also, he does have gold plated choppers.

9. First of all let me apologize for the poor quality of the picture. I searched the vast Internet for the perfect picture of Danny Glover and this was the one that was perfect. Danny Glover has always been a handsome chap but I think he made the list due to his recent looks. He has aged wonderfully and is fortunate enough to have a nice whitish-grey moustache. In addition to the great moustache he has managed to keep slim. He still looks great in jeans.

8. Eets gittin HOT in hewre... Nelly busted on the scene with one of the most exhilarating songs of this new 21th Century. His #1 single was played throughout the world in sweaty nightclubs and dirty European Anglo pubs; giving the opportunity for swarms of drunken Indians to shake their bits and pieces at the femaleas. But Nelly made this list for his trademark band-aid on his left cheek. That's HOT!

7. I am pissed. I selected big bad boy George Foreman as # 7 with the intentions of finding one specific picture that is embedded in my brain. It is a picture that must not exist and only can be seen on video. It is the picture of a young brassy Foreman strolling through the streets of Zaire as the excitement of the "Rumble in the Jungle" rises. What was so striking and sexy of this young foreman was his chapeau that neatly fit his head.

6. Here we have the up and coming Avery Johnson. This young man was a integral team player in the NBA (mainly with the Spurs) and then was given the opportunity to continue his career as head coach for the Dallas Mavericks. What's so attractive about this fella is his presentation of self. His language is soothing and I feel that I could listen to him as he dissects opposing teams with his simple, yet flowing language. He makes the list at 6 because of his verbal skills.

5. Now we are getting to the good ones. Mr. Eriq La Salle and his puppy dog good looks. Eriq La Salle first captured the hearts of young females as the slimy Daryl in an American classic, Coming to America. He re-captured old hearts as the successful surgeon, Dr. Peter Benton, on the hit TV show E.R. Eriq La Salle has had a few identity transformations but we are all most fond of that innocent grin.

4. A.I. might deserve a spot higher on the list. He loses some of his flair from his insignificant head bands and random tattoos. I think the ink fits A.I. well but if you've ever had a chance to study it closely you might have a hard time figuring out what they mean. A.I. knows better. A.I. also has a very childish, young look and he is one of the best, most fluid bball player in the game. Another plus for A.I. is that, while he is known to be a bit difficult to coach and play with, he plays 110% and gives it all hes got when on the court.

3. Another basketball player, Kobe Byrant. This guy is one physical specimen. He was his own man when teammates with Shaq and has become the symbol of Phil Jackson Laker Basketball. Kobe created a bad image for himself when he made a poor choice in Colorado. But he was found to be not-guilty and that means he get the #3 spot. Bottom line is that he is quite a good looking man.

2. Sorry TO but Donovan is much better looking than you are. He has great taste and knows how to wear a suit. He is the man in Philly and has become quite an actor lately, shoveling tasty spoonfuls of Chunky Campbell's Soup down his gullet. He has a very sexy nasally tone with his voice and when he scrambles away from defenders, he looks like he is boogieing down to some Herbie Hancock. I'm sure the producers of those soup commercials wanted to kill him because it probably took weeks for him to remember all of his lines but his charm probably won them over in the end.

1. Mr. Jay Z back out of retirement, dating the lovely Beyonce. He is certainly on top of the world. This man has incredible taste in his clothing, he produces and performs in some of the best rap videos this world has known and he is extremely good looking. The Co-Owner of the New Jersey Nets deserves the #1 spot and will remain there as long as he keeps it up with the attire.

Ok, I feel like i should make a few disclaimers.... This is just for fun, I am not a homo-sexual nor am I racist.
Hope you enjoyed. I certainly enjoyed the opportunity to express myself!

Tuesday, January 2, 2007

Guillermo Del Toro's - Pan's Labyrinth

Guillermo Del Toro, Other movies include: Cronos, Mimic, The Devil's Backbone, Blade II, Hellboy

Brief Summary: from "'Pan's Labyrinth' is the story of a young girl that travels with her pregnant mother to live with her mother's new husband in a rural area up North in Spain, 1944. After Franco´s victory. The girl lives in an imaginary world of her own creation and faces the real world with much chagrin. Post-war Fascist repression is at its height in rural Spain and the girl must come to terms with that through a fable of her own."

My Review:
Let me start out by saying that I had never heard of this film until a few weeks ago. It's poster was up on various sidewalk construction sites and was scarcely on the theaters walls. I originally thought this to be a children's movie and paid little attention to the few posters. This weekend I was browsing the movies in theaters and noticed Pan's Labyrinth had an R rating. I read the summary and was immediately sucked in. I decided to go see it @ 9:55PM Monday night @ the Sunshine Landmark Theater. ( a popular venue for indie, foreign films which is always littered with all sorts of characters). Like a good little New Yorker I showed for the flic 45 minutes early thinking I would have plenty of time to get a drink and have a good seat. The place was jammed with one horrible line. No drink but I was able to get a decent seat.

I am not going to really say anything about the movie because I feel you should go into with a fresh clean mind. The film was very original and thought provoking. It flows wonderfully and you barely notice the time fly. I was extremely pleased to see Sergi Lopez play the role of the BRUTAL captain as he dominated the screen and became, in my opinion, one of the best villains in movie history. Yes it was that good. I was first introduced to Sergi Lopez when he played the peculiar "Harry" in Dominik Moll's "With a Friend Like Harry". In both roles he was able to convince me of the pure insanity that dwelled throughout his ominous being. His unpropitious demeanor shocked me and I found myself wanting to know more about this horrible character. He stole the show.

Pan's Labyrinth is classified anywhere from a Drama/Fantasy/ Horror/Thriller/War genre which, to me, indicates its density and uniqueness. I entered the theater wanting to see a Tim Burtonesque underworld of friendly monsters and treacherous ghouls. I did not expect to be sucked into the plot too much and figured my money would be well spent with some "eye candy". I was completely surprised to find an extremely good film.

I give this film 5 out of 5 Stars. had a 99% red tomato, which is usually a good source of honest (sometimes over the top honest) criticism.

If you see this movie I would love for you to give me your thoughts.